The List

It was brought to my attention that I have yet to write about the adventures, real and imaginary, that my BFFF (For those of you who haven't watched Pineapple Express, the extra "F" is crucial) and I have gone on. I've had what seems like months to think about them, especially since my partner in crime has left me for the exotic and unfamiliar North, two days ago.

To bring you up to speed, I'll explain a little bit about the List: It's a very important mental note that we keep about men who are on the verge of running into us, conversing with us, falling in love with us, chasing us, and catching us (swoon). The top...ten are pretty solid but the rest, easily interchangeable. Just put an attractive man in a period piece and he pops straight up the line.

I would probably have to write a whole 'nother blog about the situations we've cooked up over the years. Here's the most recent exchange via text:

My BFFF told me that she had gone to a diamond exhibit in Chi-town. Naturally, she scouted potential engagement rings for Hugh J. and Chris P. (think Star Trek, not SNL) to buy us.

I started to doubt. Maybe they weren't even thinking about finding us... But NO, my brilliant BFFF steps in to tell me that our men were gazing up at the moon, hoping that we were looking at it too. It's hard to know their true feelings for us when all they do is leave us cryptic hints and subtle gestures when doing interviews. We can't always read between the lines you know!

Of course, all would be forgiven if each man sent us a love letter, a sonata, or an ode even. Daniel Johns must do an entire album though. He owes us for that 20yr. old he's been accessorizing with!