My flight(s) was...what you`d expect from a 10+hour plane ride: The inviting and unimaginably vertical seats, the electrifying fleece/nylon combo blanket, the ever so MOD lighting, and equate-IKEA inspired tray tables. Not to forget, the overwhelming aroma of stale flight food and B.O. that overtakes you after about hour 8.
My connections all went smoothly. I even had enough time to create an entire dramedy between an international flight attendant and a meek airport security guy. He loves her overseas stories and how professional she looks in her low pumps and high bun. He only gets to see her when she happens to fill in the Toronto to Minneapolis/St. Paul flight for her friend, which doesn`t happen often enough. He dreams of them mile high-ing it but quickly pushes those thoughts aside. She is a first class lady! Not an economy whore. He can only relish in the moments it takes to escort her to her connecting flight... I digress
Speaking of dramedy. Yet AGAIN, the romantic comedy Gods have frowned upon me. I did not have a gorgeous seat-neighbor in 54E. Sigh
All I asked is to, in a random happenstance, meet a beautiful and funny guy who`d think I was still adorable after the international flight odor had set in and my hair had taken a strange form after the static had taken hold of it. All the while, enjoying our witty banter and sharing my love for food and theatre. Didn`t think that was too much to ask.
Instead, I was surrounded by the early-bird vacation tour group and the masked avengers (the sneeze-cover masks, not the `Ooh, I want to know your alter ego` masks). Did I say avengers? I meant the masked strangers. The one military guy, who`s back of the head looked promising, was bumped up to a better seat because the flight attendant also had a son in the navy or whatever. Just my luck. Oh well, it may not have worked with him anyway. He probably had a grandparent or great uncle who fought in the war and loathed Asians, making Christmas with the family nearly impossible.
If I can`t meet people in planes, maybe I should try and trip constantly. Sooner or later, I`ll have to fall into some strong and caring hands, right? But, I have been doing this plane thing for a while with no luck...Where are the bars around here?
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