Just Do It

I think it’s time to talk about where my life has taken me since my year, well actually two-year, absence. I can’t count 2010 because I wrote a total of what, 11 posts?

I had wanted to loosen the grip my hometown had on me since…I was a senior in high school. It was probably a mix between laziness, fear, and the security I had that made me stay. At that time, I had so much to lose if I left. But as time passed and those secure bonds broke and fell apart, I still kept having one too many conversations about wanting to leave… It was time.

Sure I would be leaving my dear friends and family behind and that was definitely the hardest part but I was more than ready to say goodbye to my lack of growth. I didn’t want to bitch anymore! My biggest excuse was that I didn’t want to fail and come back home. I wanted so much to be a success story and so afraid to fail that I gave up trying all together.

The hard part was actually deciding where I wanted to go and what I wanted to do. Ideally, I wanted to rent a cheap but charming studio apartment in Brooklyn and live the big city life in a place that I loved and stimulated me in many ways. Realistically, living there, the city would have eaten me alive. I needed to get my feet wet before I cannonballed into that excitement. I still dream of one day heading that way but for now…

I didn’t really have any other place in mind where I HAD to be besides New York. I wanted to be near a big city but not big enough or aggressive enough that I would have to constantly have my hand poised on my pink pepper spray. I also had to decide why I would go. Well, I did actually think about going to culinary school. I love food and preparing it but I didn’t necessarily want to make it into a career. I didn’t want to wake up at 6 in the morning after a crazy 10 plus hour shift and hate raising a spatula to make myself eggs. A couple weekend cooking classes with a professional chef would be enough for me. So, my other thing was massage.

I don’t think I ever mentioned my goal to fit into every single Asian stereotype but this was another one. Here’s an excerpt from my scholarship essay: Massage has always been a part of my life. When I was on the high school swim team, I became the designated massager to warm up muscles before an event or sooth sore arms on the bus ride home. Same thing when I worked in restaurants. It’s tough being on your feet and holding plates, shift after shift. I had read a couple things about massage therapy but even with my limited knowledge, I knew that what I was doing was helping my friends, family, and coworkers to relax. I feel like I have a talent for this… etc etc etc

So, long story short, I decided on a school, picked on one of their many locations, used my Thanksgiving break to look at apartments, and BOOM! I made it happen.